Thursday, August 27, 2009

GYMKOMMENTARY #8: Universal Soldier: The Return

Like Jean-Claude Van Damme, Grover Cleveland, or that case of herpes you got in Sausalito, Gymkommentary has returned!


The Tale of the Tape
Film: Universal Soldier: The Return (1999)
Director: Mic Rodgers
Runtime: 82 minutes
Genre: Needless Action Franchise Prolonger
Stars: Jean-Claude Van Damme, Michael Jai White, Heidi Schanz, Xander Berkeley
Rated: R for Excessive Male Grunting, Blatant HAL 9000 ripoffs, and A Totally Gratuitous Scene in a Strip Club
IMDb, Wikipedia, Michael Jai White's "Private Alcove"

To get this UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: THE RETURN GYMKOMMENTARY FILE in your iTunes, open iTunes then go "Advanced" to "Subscribe to Podcast" and then enter this link:

http://feeds.feedburner.com/gymkommentary

Yes, JCVD is back. And he brought his spin kicks, that big knot on his forehead, and some new pals including pro wrestler Bill "Goldberg" Goldberg for Universal Soldier Colon The Return. Wait is the colon supposed to be silent? Eh, whatever.

Thursday, August 6, 2009

Gymkommentary 8 -- COMING SOON!

OK, so it's not recorded yet. But it will be. Soon. OK, soonish. Not later, anyway. More like midway between sooner and later. And, this time, instead of giving a cryptic clue, I'm gonna just TELL you what movie we're doing. Assuming you're up for a little game of You Tube Movie Trailer Charades. Here goes!

First word:



Second word:



Third and Fourth words:



Look for it by the end of the month. Oh yes.