Thursday, April 22, 2010

GYMKOMMENTARY #12: X-Men Origins: Wolverine

The Gymkommentarians. They're the best there is at what they do. And what they do is watch crummy movies and make fun of them.

(OK, yes, well technically, there's a bunch of other people who are better at it, and who make a nice living doing it. But given the fact that Matt and Chris both have day jobs, significant others, and lives, and do this for free around all that other stuff, they're really not that bad at it.)

(In fact, now that I think about it, maybe they are the best there is at what they do. And what they do is watch crummy movies and make fun of them when their busy schedules and very patient loved ones allow.)

(We can all agree on that, right? I mean that's not reaching too far. I'm gonna move on.)

The Tale of the Tape
Film: X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)
Director: Gavin Hood
Runtime: 107 minutes
Genre: Pointless Yet Pointy Prequel
Stars: Hugh Jackman, Liev Schreiber, Danny Huston, Will.I.Am, Lynn Collins
Rated: PG-13 for Intense Sideburns, Repeated Screams of the Name "VICTOR!", Scenes Involving People Stabbing Each Other With Claws Yet Inexplicably Drawing No Blood Whatsoever
IMDb, Wikipedia, A Wolverine Fan Site That Looks Like It's The Oldest Site on the Entire Internet

To get this X-MEN ORIGINS: WOLVERINE GYMKOMMENTARY FILE in your iTunes, open iTunes then go "Advanced" to "Subscribe to Podcast" and then enter this link:

This time on Gymkommentary, your fearless hosts get snikt attacked by one crappy comic book movie. Not even Hugh Jackman back in the role that deservedly made him a movie star, Ryan Reynolds perfectly cast as Deadpool, and a screenplay from the writer of Spike Lee's 25th Hour could salvage this mess. You don't need psychic powers to see this thing going south right from the start, with a prologue featuring that classic cliche where someone devastated by tragedy screams "NOOOOOOO!" as the camera cranes upward. Which, come to think of it, really sums up the reaction people have to X-Men Origins: Wolverine in a nutshell.